“Weapons of Math Instruction”

Math Instruction

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From a reliable source:

Someone very cleverly concocted this mathematical humour to amuse, and believe you me, it’s much more amusing than conceivable.

A school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and a calculator.


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At a morning press conference, Attorney General Eric Holder said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement.


He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.


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Algebra

‘Al-Gebra is a problem for us’, the Attorney General said. ‘They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off at tangents in search of absolute values.


‘They use secret code names like “X” and  “Y” and refer to themselves as “unknowns”, but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country.


As the Greek philosopher Isosceles used to say, “There are 3 sides to every triangle.”


When asked to comment on the arrest, President Obama said, “If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, he would have given us more fingers and toes.”

White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President.


It is believed that another Nobel Prize will soon follow.

 

Nobel Prize Awards for Discovery of Graphene

photo of Prof Geim
Prof. Geim - Image via Wikipedia

(Source: Pravda-ru)

 

Graphene

Graphene is both the thinnest and the strongest material yet discovered, opening up new frontiers in quantum physics. Two Russian scientists have been awarded the Nobel Prize for Physics for their work developing graphene.

 Andrei Geim and Konstantin Novoselov demonstrated that carbon in its extremely thin form – just one atom thick – had exceptional properties originating in the world of quantum physics.

Konstantin Novoselov is a Royal Society Research Fellow at the University of Manchester in their Mesoscopic Research Group researching mesoscopic systems and nanostructures. He was awarded the 2008 Europhysics Prize for the same discovery.

Andre Geim is a physicist who, as well as the discovery of graphene, is known for the development of gecko tape and demonstrations of diamagnetic levitation. He’s also based at the University of Manchester.

Graphene is both the thinnest and the strongest material yet discovered. Geim and Novoselov extracted it from ordinary graphite, and used ordinary adhesive tape to obtain a flake of carbon with a thickness of just one atom.

“Andre Geim and Konstantin Novoselov have shown that carbon in such a flat form has exceptional properties that originate from the remarkable world of quantum physics,” says the Royal Swedish Academy of Sciences.

“A vast variety of practical applications now appear possible including the creation of new materials and the manufacture of innovative electronics. Graphene transistors are predicted to be substantially faster than today’s silicon transistors and result in more efficient computers.”


It is said that investments in Graphene will reap huge dividends.